7 Signs that you’re at a crossroad in life and how to get back on the right path

on Jul 09 in Uncategorized by

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How is it for you when your life feels like it is off track? Boring? Tiring? Exhausting? Do you struggle getting up in the morning? Does your day drag on? Do you have little or no energy? Do you constantly worry about the judgment of others? Do you start to lose trust in yourself? Do you feel stuck and not quite sure what you really want?

A few years ago I knew this feeling very well. I was lost and dissatisfied and I just didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. I remember sitting in a coffee shop with a dear friend and telling her I just didn’t feel fulfilled but I didn’t know why. I loved my husband and had 3 beautiful children and I knew needed something more. I didn’t know then but I was at a crossroads in my life. These crossroads pop up every so often in our life and if we chose to take action and try something new they lead us down a new exciting path.

I love learning. I always have done (apart from when I was at school!). In the past I took so many courses ranging from Tai chi to gardening that it started to become a family joke… “What course is Marie going to take this week?” everyone would ask. It was only when I started learning about myself and discovering my own personal growth that I truly started to come into my own. Through a process of self discovery I started to work out what was important to me. What my values were and where they were and were not present in my life. One of the values I discovered was that it was hugely important for me to start giving back and serve others in some way. Initially I wasn’t sure exactly what this meant. I didn’t know how I wanted to serve. In many ways I was already giving back so much by looking after my husband and family and as we all know this can take up every moment of our lives. But for me I knew I needed something outside of the home environment. So I began by going back through my life and discovering all the experiences I had gained in work and life. I started to join the dots in the past that lead me to where I was at that moment. I looked back and found the places and times in my life that I felt fully alive and excited with what I was doing, I noticed how I felt at these times and the impact I was having in the lives of others around me. I call these times my golden moments.

My golden moments gave me great insight into what I was doing right, what made me feel on top of the world and what my strengths were. We often have a tendency to focus on what we are not good at, but instead of focusing on my weaknesses, what I couldn’t do or wasn’t good at, and trying to improve on them, I chose to start acknowledging my strengths; discovering what I was good at and I can even say now things I was great at !
For me my strengths are connecting with others, communicating, listening, guiding, motivating and inspiring. I started working on these strengths to make them even better and stronger. As I continued to build on these strengths the strangest things started to happen. Even though I still wasn’t 100% clear about what I wanted to do, opportunities began presenting themselves to me. As I talked to people about what I loved to do and shared my strengths with others my path started to move. I would meet people, and they would introduce me to someone else. I would be presented with offers and opportunities.

In fact so many opportunities came that at one point I began to lose clarity again and it felt a little confusing as I knew there were many directions and paths that I could take. At this point of confusion I remember deciding to connect to my intuition, which is another strength of mine, and along with my intuition it was keeping my values, the things that were important in my life right then, in my head and heart that help moved me further into clarity. Our values are what we feel to be important to make our lives fulfilling. For me my top value was freedom, this word can mean many different things to different people but for me freedom equated to being self employed. Then with each step I chose to take, I started to lift the fog and get clear about the direction I wanted to take. I started to say no to things that didn’t honor my values and of course then the perfect opportunities started to come my way. I would be attending an event and suddenly the right person would turn up at this events and because I was learning to ask for help and let go of my limiting belief that I had to do it all on my own, I would ask and they would point me in the right direction. And if they couldn’t help they could put me in contact with someone who could. I began to trust and believe in myself and what I was doing.

I had doubt and fear just like everyone else (I still do) but I knew for sure that I wanted to have an impact on the world no matter how small and in a different way than I had been with being a wife and mother. As I gained clarity, asked for help and stepped into action, the path that I was walking on began to develop in front of my eyes.

I am still walking, sitting, skipping and leaping on my path. I continue to reach crossroads and make decisions about my life and where I want it to go. When the crossroad comes upon me I practice all these simple tools to help me decide which direction I will choose. It is a great journey of discovery. These discoveries showed me how to trust in myself again, to know my values and honor them in my everyday living, to be proud of my unique gifts to be aware when doubt rose and to acknowledge fear but also to discover and appreciate the joy and ease I came to know when walking on the right path which allowed me to shine and in turn allowed others to shine. This was the fulfillment that I had been searching for.

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So here are 7 signs that you may be at a crossroads in your life

1. You are tired all the time
2. Your emotions are all over the place
3. You cannot make decisions
4. You don’t feel passionate about life
5. You do not trust your own judgment
6. There feels like something is missing from your life
7. You are simply going through the motions of everyday life
Now here are some of the lessons I learned through this experience that my life was off track and I was at a crossroads. I used them to get back on track and create the fulfilling life that I now live. I hope they are useful to you and empower you to choose the direction you want next for your life.

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1. Emotions – Your emotions are an excellent indicator for fulfillment. Emotions are present in your life to tell you something. Listen to them. What is it that you need to know?
2. Golden Moments – Look back and rediscover your own golden moments. These moments in your life are the moments you felt fully alive and were at your very best. What you were doing? Who was around you? What impact were you having on your world?
3. Strengths- Know your strengths and what you are good at and them keep practicing these strengths making them better. This is what makes you unique.
4. Values- Discover your values- the things in your life that that you feel is highly important to you. Our values keep us living on purpose and on track. When we know and honor our values life is happy and fulfilling.
5. Trust yourself – By connecting to your inner knowing or intuition and making decisions from this place you can overcome fear and move forward into the life that you know is right for you
6. Actions – Take small steps and gain clarity then when opportunities come that are in line with your values then leap into action and allow your path open up to you.
And finally
7. Ask – Asking for help is a sign of courage. Asking opens up communication, and helps build relationships with your connections. The truth is most people love to help and want you to succeed. So pickup your courage and ask for what you need.

 

Please feel free to leave a comment and share your thoughts. Marie

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